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Ninteenth leaf (2)
Yuu-chan 2025.06.04. 22:50
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After Dr Pauli’s leaving, An Zhe took away the tray, and followed the old man – Lu Feng felt like An Zhe wanted to talk about something with the doctor, so he didn’t stop him. He began observing his surroundings, and he found his own clothes, washed and dried, folded into a perfect square in the drawer. His bullet necklace lay on them. Now being free from the infusion, he dressed up, put his chain into his neck, and wandered off.
He quickly found his way out to the balcony, which ran along the building’s outer surface, giving him a good view on the scenery. Lu Feng clenched both of his hands on the railing, and looked forward.
He had never been in such a high place before. His experience with the magnetic pole was not even comparable to this – he stood on one of the highest mountains he had ever seen, on the top of a white building, and the sky above him seemed so close as if he could reach for the drifting clouds and the glaring sun. The wind was cold, but soft, welcoming him, and under his feet, a vast greenery lay. The Abyss spread out for a long, long while, to the horizon and beyond, in every direction.
Lu Feng was in awe. This place had always been his ancestor’s favourite, and now he felt like it had become his favourite too. He quite enjoyed the scenery of the Main City, not so much of the Outer City, but he always missed nature, and it seemed like his life… or fate, as humans would call it, gave him the place he wished for: a high peak with nothing but plants and flowers, peaceful and home-like.
He stood there for a long time under the sunlight when he felt a small touch on his elbow.
An Zhe put his fingers on his arm, as he quietly stood beside him. He dressed up as well, and held something in his other hand, but looked at the scenery, not reciprocating Lu Feng’s gaze.
“We couldn’t keep our promise to have a date on the magnetic pole again, but this feels better.” And then, he chuckled.
Lu Feng smiled.
“Mn.”
“Lu Feng… I spoke to Jibran.” The rose raised his eyebrows, and An Zhe continued right away. “He always had a secret connection to this place. What a son of a gun…“ The ex-Arbiter unexpectedly cursed at the doctor. “I told him a few times that he shouldn’t make contact with this place… but… well, this saved us, so I guess I shouldn’t be angry at him. And we still can talk to him. Anyway… he sent you something. He said… I quote: I can’t find the autopsy result you’ve asked for, but I found this one.”
An Zhe lifted his other hand, and offered him a paper.
“I printed it out, so you can read it.”
Lu Feng took the paper, and he saw a familiar form: a psychological assessment from a certain someone.
Gao Tang’s… or, more precisely Ren Chenggong’s paper was neatly filled. His handwriting was just as choosey as his appearance. However, the questions were slightly different from what Lu Feng had to fill out. When he looked at it closer, he noticed, that according to the header, the form was created by the United Front Center’s management.
There were two questions at the end that felt very nostalgic to Lu Feng: the two that asked about humanity’s biggest strength and weakness.
His heart jumped when he read Ren’s answer.
“Humanity’s kindness is their biggest strength. Their empathy and goodness make them capable of achieving their own evolution, always seeking more information. But it’s also their most vulnerable trait. Kindness is a weakness when people don’t know how to use it.”
Lu Feng remembered the General’s face when he saw the rose’s answer, which was the same as Ren’s, only with fewer details.
“General Zhang…” He started, staring at those words intently. “Did he know about Gao Tang’s infection?”
An Zhe didn’t reply at first, he was also looking at the paper, lost in his thoughts before he spoke up, whispering.
“I think he must have known. When I shot Gao Tang, he was furious. At that time, I felt too guilty to see the source of his anger. But… You know, when you appeared at the gates, and the higher-ups learned about my doubt over you, the General personally called me to ensure that I won’t shoot you down. He imposed a ton of excuses on me, it honestly felt like he was one word away from threatening me. Of course, I was busy with my own demons, and I didn’t want to make any more mistakes, so I just accepted everything, as I originally wanted. But then, he sacrificed a whole city for your sake. I was not expecting that… no one would expect that. Yet, no one questioned it from his colleagues. I was a mere Colonel, I had no qualification to scold a general, but he had good comrades who could do that, yet, everyone kept their silence. It was odd. I tried to find any reason for his actions, but I met with hard walls from all directions. It reminded me of the case with your mother… And now, I think I understand. I understand, why he didn’t want you to die, why Madam Lu could work against me so well, that she didn’t leave a single trace behind, and why we had been chased all the way to the Abyss… to the point that even with applying a ten-year seclusion, they still sent out a troop for us.” He sighed deeply. “Back then, he wasn’t angry at me for shooting a Lieutenant, but for shooting someone with such great abilities that they couldn’t figure out in time…”
Lu Feng hummed when An Zhe’s voice faded, looking at Gao Tang’s paper again, but didn’t see the words themselves.
“It would make sense.” He said with hazed vision. “My mother probably was scared to death, when I learned about my father’s identity. She might have been asking for help from the General personally. They tortured me to make me forget this information, that could’ve broken the whole Northern Base if people find out about it… I don’t know, if my mom told him beforehand that Gao Tang was infected, or that was her first confession, but regardless… they had to keep it a secret at any cost, even risking killing me off.” Lu Feng didn’t realise, he was talking of a first-person viewpoint, he got lost in his and his ancestor’s thoughts.
After his elbow had been squeezed, Lu Feng looked up, and emerged from the sea of memories. An Zhe was pale and looked at him almost agitated. The rose realised, maybe he had spoken a bit too much, and put his hand onto the small shoulder with a small smile.
“It’s fine now. It doesn’t matter anymore.” Perhaps it was just a white lie, but the rose really thought, it didn’t worth to be upset about the matter. “Whatever happened, we are here now. We have to think about our future.”
With this statement, he gave the paper back to An Zhe, who hummed, and taking his advice to heart, he let his worry go, putting the paper away. Lu Feng’s expression probably made him remember that he didn’t answer to Dr Pauli yet if they would stay here, or go away… because, of course, the rose didn’t plan to go separate ways with An Zhe.
At that point, he wanted to ask if An Zhe would wish to stay, but before he said it, he realised he knew the answer. The way the young man acted in the Abyss on that one day, when he was free from every worry, talking about species and experiments and biology and studies… His partner was a biology doctor, after all. This was a part of him, not just a hobby of his, but something he learned for many years.
And regardless of that, An Zhe wasn’t a xenogenic. He didn’t leave the base because he wanted, he was chased away. But he was a human, and the rose knew that humans were very sociable beings. Not that different from roses; a flower living alone in a deserted, lifeless field was nothing but sad and shameful. Roses are the most beautiful in large bushes too.
And what if they go out to the wilderness again? Lu Feng barely kept his person alive. It wasn’t his doing that An Zhe’s fever ceased, it was another weird xenogenic that helped him in the end. What if some monster would sniff them out once? Can they avoid them for years and years? And if An Zhe gets injured, then it would be the same worry for the rose, once again trying his best to save him, but failing… Is that worth it?
While he, as a plant, had a home in the wilderness, An Zhe could strive among humans the best. Well, half-humans in this case, but still closer to them than the monsters from the Abyss.
He didn’t want to leave An Zhe’s side. So, there wasn’t really any choice to make. On top of that, he immediately took a liking to the environment as well. He’d never wanted to live in that dark forest, he wanted the sun to reach him as much as possible.
“They fought for us.” An Zhe suddenly spoke up again. He shone a small smile at him. “They told me… When Tang Lan and the others found us in the Abyss, you were so exhausted, they couldn’t wake you up, and I was in a delirious state because of the mushrooms. They were preparing to take us back, but the soldiers noticed them. They engaged in a battle for us.”
“Oh.”
An Zhe didn’t have to continue for the rose to understand what that meant. It meant that, since An Zhe was the kind of person who didn’t want to be indebted to anyone for their kindness, he now felt that it was his duty to repay. He might have wanted to go with Lu Feng if Lu Feng decided to leave, but because he owed these people a lot, he wouldn’t go with him, even if it would hurt him deeply. This struggle slowly appeared on the pale face too. Before the young man could say anything about it, Lu Feng pulled him closer in a tighter embrace.
“I’ve never thought about it, but I guess my liking for high places wasn’t my thing entirely.” He said suddenly, looking forward to the Abyss. “I think both Gao Tang and Lu Feng liked this place, even before I knew it existed. I’m a rose. I always lived on the ground with other roses. I knew nothing about high places to be drawn to them so badly. It’s unnatural for a rose to care for the elevation of its homeland, well, to a certain degree. As long as the circumstances are good, we can live anywhere. Yet, I always wanted to come higher. Now, I think it was not me, but maybe Gao Tang, who wanted to go higher. And Lu Feng, who felt at home in the Abyss more than in human society.”
An Zhe listened to him silently, and after he finished speaking, there was a few moments of silence. The residents of this place were walking around here and there in front of the building. In the yard, there were a few types of machines scattered around. The quietness didn’t only contain the howling of the wind and the rustling of the forests below, but small chats and laughter, that the breeze carried up to them. It was still quite peaceful.
“I don’t think it matters.” An Zhe said after a while. “Even if the feeling came from them, it doesn’t make it less valid for yourself. As long as it’s not a force for you to do or feel something, and you enjoy what you enjoy, it’s yours.”
Lu Feng slowly licked his lips, and his fingers slightly flinched on An Zhe’s shoulder.
“I took the life Lu Feng had, and pretended to be him.” He said in a lower voice. “Yet I felt comfortable in his skin. I’ve never feared you or death, just like him. I’ve always felt I can relate to him in many ways.”
“That’s good. He got someone in the end, who can understand him. I’m glad it was you then. He deserved to be understood.”
The answer was such An Zhe-like that the rose had to smile. Yet, his chest became much lighter after hearing it. Maybe, unconsciously, he felt guilt for taking this man’s place shamelessly, lying about him, and sticking his nose into his family matters and feelings, which he didn’t intend to do in the beginning. He just wanted to be with his family when he came to the human base; he never expected that he would want to replace him, or find his way among humans, let alone solve the mystery behind his empty life and death.
“By the way… I went ahead, and asked Dr Pauli if you can plant your seeds in this place.” An Zhe spoke again, with a more cheerful and expectant tone. “He was overjoyed… He said, he loves flowers, and that there is plenty of places in the territory of the institute that can be turned into a garden. So, if you want…”
“You don’t have to convince me.”
An Zhe quieted, and after exchanging a curious look, he grew the red mist under his eyes, and his happiness lit up the light eyes. He tilted his head to Lu Feng’s chest.
“I didn’t do it only to convince you though.” He still murmured, somewhat stubbornly. “I just wanted you to be happy… You always wanted to plant those seeds, so I figured, you would be worried if you can’t do it here. I also have to learn how to take care of flowers, so… I can take care of you, even if you would change form. I still want to see your true form.”
Lu Feng smiled again, and gave a light kiss on the top of the dishevelled head.
“Why are you so interested in that?” He asked, not as if he was going to refuse him. It was quite flattering that An Zhe wanted to see him, and now, knowing that human Lu Feng had unrealistically high expectations towards superficial things, the rose wasn’t so afraid of showing his “wretched” petals to his person.
“Hmh… maybe for the same reason you stole my data from the Garden of Eden. Haven’t you just wanted to see me as a kid?” His voice was somewhat sarcastic and sulking at the same time, under the coat of kind teasing. “I looked into your communicator just now, I wanted to print out Dr Pauli’s letter.”
Lu Feng froze, and embarrassment washed over him. He couldn’t reply right away, his mind went blank for a moment. The catastrophe had already happened; Dr Ji might have been overreacting because of Lu Feng’s request at that time, but Lu Feng still didn’t want An Zhe to know about this… But it was irreversible.
“…It was Dr Ji who stole it, not me.”
“Are you seriously shift-blaming?”
“No. It was really him. I’m bad at computer stuff.”
An Zhe couldn’t protest against that, he just shot a displeased look at him. Lu Feng swallowed. He had to save face, but he had no idea how to.
“Sorry. Yes, I asked him. But I will show you my true form. So can I… keep that picture?”
An Zhe’s eyes twitched, and he pursed his lips. There was a few moments of silence while he contemplated if Lu Feng deserved to keep the picture.
“Did you like it?” He asked at last.
“Yes.” Lu Feng saw nothing wrong with that. Of course, maybe he was a bit biased towards bud-An Zhe.
“…Well, okay. Keep it then.”
The rose was happy.
“I’ll teach you how to take care of plants.” He jumped back to the other proposal that An Zhe brought up before exposing him. Lu Feng’s voice and face were very solemn now. “Come to think of it… how’s a biologist bad at gardening?”
An Zhe immediately pulled back, and his face was not just pink, but red this time.
“I really don’t know!” He almost sounded apologetic. “I did everything I knew about plants from my textbooks, and it just didn’t work out! And, and, it was a long time ago, since the base let people keep plants around, so the available guidance was very limited! No one actually knows a lot about keeping plants under human control anymore, even if we knew their nature… So, it just… It happened to not work out, I don’t know!”
Lu Feng laughed out loud, which made An Zhe shut up once more. This was maybe the first time the rose let his laugh escape from his lungs because previously he had to act like his ancestor – he didn’t think human Lu Feng laughed ever again after his discovery about his father.
He laughed for a long time, and surprisingly, he ran out of oxygen. He never expected that laughing could be suffocating or exhausting, but once he couldn’t give out more sounds, he lightly panted, trying to catch his breath. Yet, he was still smiling – and yet… a small moisture sat in the corner of his eyes as if he cried when he truly did not.
He quickly wiped it down, and with this freeing and dizzying feeling he got from the laughter, he looked at the dumbfounded, red-faced An Zhe, who started at him with many emotions in his light eyes, which were sparkling brightly under the sun. Lu Feng grinned at him, and put his hand on the soft hair to help the wind tangle his strands even more. He stroked so viciously that An Zhe lost his shock, and began sulking; he waved away Lu Feng’s hand, trying to brush his hair with his fingers. He pouted again.
“Let’s correct this flaw of yours then.” Lu Feng said slightly hoarsely. An Zhe shot a piercing look at him. “I promise, I’ll make you the best gardener in the world. For exchange…” Lu Feng fell into his thoughts about what to ask for that was equally important to him as this was to An Zhe. The young man suspiciously measured him from head to toe.
“For what?”
He earnestly thought about it for a long while, making his person curious and impatient – this in itself was an achievement, there wasn’t many people who could make the ex-Arbiter impatient.
Lu Feng suddenly leaned over, close to his face, and this made the young man forget his curiosity and impatience, and probably everything else as well, as he held his breath for a moment. They’d kissed once in a while before, but the rose still managed to see this surprised and expectant expression before the kiss, and he liked it quite a bit.
But he didn’t kiss him this time; he leaned to his ear, and whispered.
“You teach me about human mating. This is the only thing I lack of experience.”
“You…”
An Zhe backed away, panting and blushing, and Lu Feng couldn’t decide if he was angry or embarrassed. He couldn’t hold back his grin, looking at him losing his mind.
“Forget it. I don’t want to be the best gardener in the world, you can get that title. I’m going back to Dr Pauli.” And just like that, he fled.
Lu Feng kept smiling for a long time staying there under the sun, letting his tendrils extend out of his body and suck the energy into his core before he went back to find his person. After all, they had some teaching to do.
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The End
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