In a couple of hours, they could say with certainty that they hadn’t been targeted by humans or monsters anymore. The aurora gently swayed above them, and at some point, the sky cleared, and they realised it was a full moon tonight, giving them some extra lighting.

     The flat land slightly changed while they were aimlessly flying from their pursuers. Small sand-mounds appeared around them, and in the distance, Lu Feng saw something uneven. If it was a mountain or a city, he couldn’t tell. He didn’t even know if they were still going to the South.

   “Dr Ji said we should go to the South?” An Zhe asked quietly, when Lu Feng told him this, after realising the young man hadn’t fallen asleep.

   “Hm. To the very South.”

   “I see…” He paused for a little while. “Did he explain? I have an idea, but…”

   “No… oh.” Lu Feng remembered something else, and one of his hands slipped off An Zhe’s thigh, and reached for his communicator. “I forgot, he sent me something…”

     But he had to find out, that his communicator’s battery died. It stayed black, no matter how much he pressed the buttons. Lu Feng slowed down his steps.

   “I guess it will be a secret forever.” An Zhe chuckled lightly.

   “Mn. But I can’t read his other messages either…” Lu Feng was disappointed. “I just asked him to send me your works.”

   “My works?” An Zhe sounded surprised, and lifted his head from Lu Feng’s shoulder.

   “Your poems.”

   “Oh… did you want to read them?”

   “Mn. I’m interested in you.” Lu Feng said it casually. An Zhe slowly put his chin back on his shoulder. He pulled himself slightly closer to him, leaning on him completely. Lu Feng felt his small, warm breath on his neck where the clothes didn’t cover him anymore.

   “Are you… still interested in me?” He whispered. “As a partner…? Did you tell Jibran… Dr Ji that we were…”

     Lu Feng stayed silent for a moment.

   “I didn’t tell him. I just didn’t deny it.” He explained, unsure about if this would mean he broke his promise of not announcing their relationship to the public.

   “Oh.”

   “I should be the one worrying about this.” He added. “I’m a xenogenic. And Lu Feng is not really me either… if you were originally interested in him.”

   “I didn’t lie to you.” An Zhe protested confidently. “You… uh, I mean, Lu Feng… Actually, do you have a name? I’m being disrespectful if I call you by someone else’s name.”

   “No.” The rose began to wonder about it. “I didn’t know many names, so I used his. But I don’t mind if you call me Lu Feng. I got used to it.”

   “Ah. I see. Well, I will refer to him as Brother Lu Feng then.” An Zhe said. “From now on, he is officially your older brother.” Lu Feng felt a brief awkwardness. If his ancestor would hear this decision, he may wish to die again. “I… I was scared of him. And of his hatred. I avoided him. And… to avoid him, I had to know, what’s his schedule, where he likes to go, and so on, so that I won’t cross his path. But my only sources were the interviews or his test results… It didn’t tell me much about his feelings and personality. I can’t say, I was close to him in the slightest. I wasn’t interested in him as a person until you showed up. How… how did he die?”

     Lu Feng strolled at a convenient pace under the night sky. As he looked ahead at the silvery-green landscape, he didn’t see the dunes they were crossing, despite how magnificent it was with the white sand interacting with those lights. He saw the scene in front of him again, the last breath that his ancestor had taken. It seemed like it was a long-long time ago, but it only happened a month and a half ago. Reliving those moments, he told An Zhe the story, and when he finished with joining Vance’s mercenary team, the young man’s hand in front of his chest slid up to his neck. Under his shirt, there was the bullet medallion.

   “So, this is…”

   “Mn. It’s his.”

     An Zhe didn’t answer right away, he took out the small item, and fiddled with it for a little while, before he closed it in his hand.

   “Now we are like that flat cone of sand

in the garden of the Silver Pavilion in Kyoto

designed to appear only in moonlight.

Do you want me to mourn?

Do you want me to wear black?

Or like moonlight on whitest sand

to use your dark, to gleam, to shimmer?

I gleam. I mourn.*”

     After his words, the only noise was the rustle of the sand in every step Lu Feng made. For a few seconds, they both remembered this person, and the rose smiled lightly. He was sure, Lu Feng would not feel a thing after getting a prayer, but he would not refuse it either.

     An Zhe pressed his head to his, and the intimate feeling warmed up Lu Feng differently.

   “I always… thought your smell is so nice… I didn’t understand, why you would use a cologne this sweet… It makes sense now. And I was right. You did attract those bugs to the Outer City. No wonder. I can relate to those bugs. I love your fragrance.”

     This was such a hard turn after the previous topic, and such a flattering thing to hear that Lu Feng felt too awkward to answer. An Zhe’s voice was small as if he wasn’t even talking to him but to himself, however, lying so close to him, it was inevitable for Lu Feng to hear it. His pulse increased, and the strange tingle came back to his stomach.

   “Do you want me to recite my poems and stories?”

   “Are you feeling well enough?”

   “My shoulder hurts, I can’t sleep. I can do it. I don’t have that many. I published them under the pen name ‘Anze’, however, the publishing department shut down just as I was appointed as the Arbiter.”

     Lu Feng then agreed to it. While walking with his partner in the sea of sand, he heard a joyful poem about a festival on a celebration day, about a heartbreak, caused by a cheating boyfriend; a poem, wondering about parents and children, and their relationship, which the narrative seemed lacking. Then another sad one about loneliness and misunderstanding, before the poems ran out. After that, An Zhe recited his small stories. He wrote one about the first snowfall in the Outer City, one about an ancient relationship between humans and their God, and finally a story about a small kitten, lost in the forest. Both his poems and stories were concentrated around individual impressions and feelings, rather than actions, like the wandering thoughts while one dreamt at night. They all had some lightness to them, even the sad or painful ones, like caught hunches that vanished right after they had been released.

     The sun peeked out ahead on their left side, so they mostly remained on the right path. Lu Feng felt his head getting heavier from sleep deprivation, but he wanted An Zhe to look at the sunrise. Then, he realised the young man had finally fallen asleep. He couldn’t stop like this, he didn’t want to wake him up. In the early morning light that enveloped the flat terrain, he noticed, that the dark line he saw on the horizon at night, had come much closer than he anticipated. It was a mountain-chain. The wind carried different smells towards him, and he unconsciously stopped. The sand shifted back to soil again, and there were rocks and small patches of grasses. Running forward, the bushes got taller, and the distant mountain grew a forest on its foot… before that area, everything turned green, and the taller grass on the meadow was blown by the wind like the waves of the ocean.

     It was oddly familiar to him. His ancestor’s favourite place, the Abyss… But how would that be possible? Did they miss all the ghost cities along the way in the night race? Well, they were travelling at full speed all day yesterday, and then at night, they were aimlessly flying away from their pursuers. It shouldn’t be that much of a surprise, but their plan wasn’t exactly to enter the Abyss right away.

     Lu Feng looked around, but he saw nothing but plain fields, and the small desert behind them. Should he change direction? Now, that they had lost all their food supplies, and more importantly, their water supplies, they couldn’t make many detours. If they go to a city, Lu Feng would need to eat human food too, because of the lack of soil, and who knows, if they can find more food or fresh, consumable water… Meanwhile, the Abyss would support both of them, but An Zhe’s wound was still too fresh.

     After standing for so long, he already started feeling dehydrated. He kicked off his boots, and rooted in the soil right away, at least to be refilled for the rest of the day. But his movements woke An Zhe up.

   “This… this is not a city… Is this the Abyss already?” The young man’s weak voice barely reached his ears. Lu Feng hummed with a frown.

   “I’m afraid. Is there any city near the Abyss?”

   “I think they are in the West.” An Zhe murmured. “Lu Feng, forget it… it would take too much time to reach it. We were lucky we didn’t attract more bugs with your flower fragrance. And I think…”

     This was another good point. However, Lu Feng couldn’t hear what An Zhe was thinking because An Zhe’s voice halted. When Lu Feng questioningly hummed, the young man’s head fell to his neck. His forehead was burning as if the sun had cooked him edible.

     Lu Feng turned his right arm into a thick tendril with a big leaf on it, and held it above him, but he knew it wasn’t the sun that made An Zhe sick, and he began tensing up. He has to find shelter and take care of him very soon.

     He was only familiar with the monsters in the Abyss because of his ancestor. Quickly thinking it through, he thought, maybe he should search for the mushroom forest. There was a large part of the Abyss, where only mushrooms would grow. Because they were either non-edible for many monsters or were even poisonous or causing hallucinations, the presence of the wild beasts visibly decreased there. But the Abyss was huge, and he was tired too, so first, they had to stop somewhere else. Finding a cave or an abandoned building would be the best choice for the night, or maybe even for a few days until An Zhe would feel better. Theoretically, if they could avoid xenogenics, he wouldn’t become infected; the air itself didn’t infect anyone, and An Zhe wasn’t injured by a monster.

     It took him a half day to just reach the forest. An Zhe woke up around noon, and Lu Feng made him eat something, and checked his wound – it wasn’t bleeding at least. The young man wanted to feed him, but then he noticed that Lu Feng didn’t have his boots on, and the rose explained that he can eat in other ways, so don’t waste food on him.

     An Zhe wasn’t in his best shape. He fell asleep again when the shadows started stretching so far, that they couldn’t see the sun. Then, they approached the forest. Under the trees, a deeper and colder shadow ruled the world. Lu Feng had to dig very deep with his roots to find the mushrooms’ mycelium, that could guide him. He often turned his limbs into tendrils too, and relied on vibrations rather than his vision. It wasn’t extremely hard, and if he were alone, he would be patient and confident. No one here would eat roses. He wasn’t food. His pollen wasn’t valuable in this place. His pollinators were far away. Maybe only some of the vines would try him, but it wasn’t difficult to avoid them.

     His worry was An Zhe. Since his last awakening, he was panting weakly into his neck with occasional shivers.

     He heard howling and rustling noises around him many times, and either his left hand with his thorns or his right hand with the pistol was ready to defend them, but in the end, he hadn’t had to use it. It felt like the monsters only checked them out from the darkness, seeing if they were food. Well, it was still a miracle if they couldn’t feel the smell of An Zhe’s blood. He welcomed this luck, but he got anxious. The misfortune was coming with the dusk, and if they couldn’t find a place to hide when the night fell, even his tendrils would not win any fight.

     At last, he found a small cave, after many hours of walking. He couldn’t tell how far in the night they were in, and his sense of danger increased significantly. He was in a hurry, he decided that any shelter will do, so once it appeared, he was heading forward it, prepared to fight for it if needed. It lay on the border of a hybrid territory: it seemed like the forest was about to end, entering a small meadow. The sky peeked out with the stars above them, and the aurora shone at the wilderness with its full glory. On the other side of the small grassy patch, above the dancing canopies, Lu Feng saw a few hats on the horizon, high up in the sky.

     Feeling more confident, for he was on the right path, he went inside this cave between the trees and rocks. It had to be a small part of a mountain; ivies, white vines, convolvuluses, and rare, unique plants were hanging on the mouth of the cave, making it hard for less intelligent species to enter – it seemed good enough. Inside, he wasn’t completely blinded: the cave was dark, tortuous and windy, echoing many kinds of noises, but on the walls and deeper in the cave there were a few fluorescent biotas that welcomed them. Somewhere, a waterdrop had fallen, making a tinkle sound.

     Of course, in the depths of this hiding spot, there weren’t many types of life: moss, algae and fungi were the dominant existences here. After going forward for at least fifteen minutes, Lu Feng found a nicely looking spot, where a green, thick moss covered most of the ground. It was soft enough for them to sleep on.

     Lu Feng untied An Zhe, and squatting down, he tilted the young man to the rocks carefully. He took one of the blankets from their DIY backpack, and immediately covered An Zhe with it. An Zhe shrugged again, and slowly looked up. He seemed weaker than before, especially in the green fluorescent light, that only contoured the line on his face. Lu Feng wiped his forehead, and while he waited for him to collect himself and warm up a bit, he searched for the medicine bag.

     It wasn’t easy to see the syringes’ labels, but when Lu Feng bent down to hold them under the cause of the light – some small mushrooms – he could see well enough to recognise the characters. He couldn’t wait any longer to give him the fever medicine, and he took out the gauze and one bottle of water.

     An Zhe watched him in the small light, and when Lu Feng turned to him, he already put his blanket away. But he couldn’t undress himself alone, for he lost his strength. He couldn’t lift his arm, so Lu Feng had to do everything. He didn’t say a word while doing it, just frowned; he didn’t mind caring for the young man, but his lack of energy and movements worried him.

     His bandage wasn’t drenched, but a small bloodstain painted it bright red again. Lu Feng meticulously put the dirty cloth away, where it didn’t touch any biota. Dr Ji sewed the wound very well, but because of their rough ride with the car, the tiny line oozed with blood as if it wasn’t sealed tightly. Lu Feng softly touched it with disinfectant, and just like before, An Zhe didn’t let out a single sound, even though his body writhed violently after the first touch.

     He had to do the same movements at the back side of his shoulder. This time, they weren’t in a hurry, and this definitely helped Lu Feng to treat the young man more carefully. After that, the wound looked a bit better, at least in the faint light. The skin felt like it was flared up around the wound. He put a new, clean cotton piece on both sides, and sealed it with gauze and tapes much more securely. He also gave the antipyretic to An Zhe, and because it was injected right into his bloodstream, by the time Lu Feng dressed him back up, and tugged the blanket around him, An Zhe came out of his daze, and felt better.

     It was time for dinner. If Lu Feng wanted, he could root inside this cave for the whole night, he shouldn’t be worried about eating, but his stomach sent hunger signals towards his brain when he helped An Zhe slowly consuming his portion. He craved some potato soup, though… But he didn’t tell An Zhe about this. He tied his partner with the blanket so tightly that it was his job to feed him and give him water.

   “Lu Feng.”

     An Zhe’s voice was faint, but it briefly echoed in the cave, amplifying his words. Lu Feng was about to pack their things away in the second blanket, and looked back. An Zhe stopped staring at him, and lowered his eyes, looking at the side. Not far from them, there was a small patch of white mushrooms at the border of the moss. They were tiny, and only a few of them grew out from the gaps of the rock – but they had a dense layer of hyphae around their own corner. They seemed to glow too, but because they were white, the green reflections distracted their brilliance.

   “Hm?”

   “I was just thinking… about a lot of things.” An Zhe whispered, and his low and kind voice wavered. “I’m not sure if I can stay alive here…” Lu Feng was about to interrupt when An Zhe raised his voice a little. “Please, don’t ignore this possibility. I’m not saying you’ll not take care of me well, but… I don’t feel well, and having such a wound here, in the Abyss… we have to be real.”

     Lu Feng’s stomach ached. He wished he had paid more attention to the road yesterday night… He made a mistake unknowingly, and now, the consequences were overwhelming. He knew An Zhe was right, so he couldn’t possibly answer. An Zhe took a few deeper breaths to get another round of energy for talking.

   “If I have to be infected, I want to be infected by you.”

     The rose stiffened, and stared at the tender, slightly glowing face in silence. He was stunned.

   “I’ve never infected anyone, I think…” Lu Feng pressed this out of his throat with difficulty.

   “Just, maybe if you put your pollen on my wounds, or touch me with your tendrils in my wound…” An Zhe paused again to collect his strength. Speaking depleted him very quickly. “I don’t know… I just… if I have to be a xenogenic, I want to be a rose. Because I… I want to be with you. For the rest of my life, even if it’s short. I know it sounds silly, and if you don’t want…”

     Before the next pausing and panting, Lu Feng closed the distance between them. Sitting beside the young man, he turned to him, and put his hand on the dishevelled head. An Zhe looked up, his head tilted into his palm, not having the strength to hold it himself. They were so close that Lu Feng could feel the fastening breath, especially the hotness of it when he exhaled.

     The light eyes also wore a green hue, and with that effect, Lu Feng thought in the back of his mind, that it seemed as if An Zhe inherited his own ice-green eye colour. His expression, however, changed. He didn’t look away, but suddenly, he looked shy, his eyelashes lightly flickered, and he bit his lower lips. Then, his gaze fell on Lu Feng’s chin… no, not on his chin. On his lips.

     Lu Feng hesitated for a moment. He stroked the young man’s temple with his thumb, his palm took the heat from the soft face pressing to it, and An Zhe’s brief shivering was palpable. Then, after some stirring, An Zhe reached out with one of his hands, and his slim, gentle fingers fell on Lu Feng’s chest. An Zhe looked at his own hand before moving it upwards, stroking him, wrinkling his shirt, and reaching his collar, where he stopped. An Zhe glanced up, his eyes questioning and uncertain, his expression expectant.

     Lu Feng wasn’t stupid, of course. He noticed it earlier too. He knew what An Zhe was yearning for, and Lu Feng yearned for it too, he just didn’t think, it was the right time… even now… An Zhe was not feeling well. But as desperately he wanted to find excuses, An Zhe attracted him just as much or even more. The rose realised it was inevitable, it was bound to happen once, and who knows if they had enough time to waste, not doing it before it was too late.

     He leaned closer, and An Zhe’s slightly misty eyes closed. Lu Feng closed his own eyes too.

     The rose didn’t have much experience. He was only kissed once, and didn’t even want that kiss. He wasn’t leading the kiss either at that time. Now, he was the one, who took control, and lightly pressed his tongue to the parting, dry lips, which opened up without any extra effort.

     This was nothing he had ever imagined it would be. It was just a small kiss, yet, his whole body flared up instantly, and an unfamiliar, urging feeling bubbled in his soul. He pulled An Zhe closer, and he felt the small arms hugging his shoulders and neck, and for the first time in his life – even in human Lu Feng’s life – the hug wasn’t annoying or strangling, it even felt too loose. His taste buds were also getting very novel and vivid stimulations; An Zhe’s taste couldn’t be comparable to anything he had ever experienced; it was a light, sweet aroma, slightly carrying the taste of his dinner and the bitterness of the medicines he took. It was warm, wet and softer than anything he could remember. Lu Feng couldn’t get enough of this, caressing him with his own tongue and lips, getting greedy to feel more of it.

     But An Zhe quickly lost his breath and strength, and fell onto Lu Feng’s chest. Lu Feng’s face was burning, his heart racing, and he wanted this moment to last much longer, and wanted to do more things, but he couldn’t. He closed his eyes, and hugged An Zhe, letting the young man rest on him, clinging to him, and panting into his neck, which sent more and more hot waves through his body.

     For the first time in his life, he experienced what a pollinator could feel when something attracted it to pollinate – or rather, he experienced the raging lust of wanting to mate with another of “his” kind. He understood now, why some people had a hard time enduring this feeling.

     An Zhe had fallen asleep, but this time, his sleep seemed much calmer than before. The medicine, the safe place, the blanket and the hug assured him that he can rest as much as he wanted, probably. Lu Feng, walking all night, wanted to stay awake for a longer time to keep an eye on him, but the very same feelings and reasons caused him to drift into the darkness as well, hugging the small figure in his arm securely, joining his dream.

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Notes:

The author of the poem is Tess Gallagher, the title is Yes

I didn’t have more creativity for poems, they are not my strength. XD

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